Bad Decisions and How They Sabotage Your Progress

A client told me yesterday that he noticed a tendency to make bad decisions when things were going the best for him.  “I seem to do something to screw things up when it’s going so well.”  That made me think about the generalized pattern for a lot of people of sabotaging their progress.  Whether it’s that someone relapses on alcohol or drugs after a time of successful sobriety or they get a promotion and then argue with the boss or miss work.  It’s that sense of discomfort we sometimes get when we’re getting ahead, almost like, “I don’t really deserve this,” and then when we mess up, its, “Okay, see, I knew something like this was going to happen.”  The most common core issue involved here is a sense of not feeling worthwhile or valuable enough to be comfortable when things are going well, almost like we are used to negatives and “make” bad things happen subconsciously if it seems like things are going too well.  Of course, that goes way back to our family-of-origin and events we experienced growing up.  We can change our programing and negative beliefs about those things once we become aware of it and process through to the truth about ourselves which is that we are special and valuable and worthy of our progress and achievements.

By Ron Deage
Clinical Director at A Turning Point